The Erotic and The Revelation

Well, I'll begin with what I remember of my dreams last night.  I was apparently at some sort of brothel or penthouse.  I remember intercourse with a latina straddled on top of me before she got up and went through some door. . .next thing you know two other females approach me.  The short haired dirty dishwater blonde is who I was attracted to, but I got the long curly haired blond instead. . .she grabbed me before the other could get to me. . .the other went to another man and the curly haired blonde went down on me. . . she got up and the other short haired more attractiv girl came to me. . .but she had just been with another man and I did not know if she was. . .messy or who had been inside of her or if they came or not, so I ended up respectfully declining before I woke up.  Not a very godly dream, no?
My wife had a dream that I divorced her and married another woman. . .She and her family took a trip to our cabin in Colorado.  I happened to be there with my new wife and the girl (K) I had a real life emotional/physical affair was there as well.  (I add emotional because the other life affairs were void of emotional ties)  K had told my wife that I'd try to have sex with her (my wife) one last time to try and make her feel better because that's just what I do and that I would tell her I loved her just to get her in bed. . . That is what I did in her dream, but she refused, telling me she knew what I was trying to do.  -Now these are real life concerns and fears being played out in her dreams, understandably.  she woke up crying from this dream. . .I was already gone when she woke up.  I volunteer for Breakfast of Beech Street at First Christian Church, which feeds the homeless and low income families every weekdays.  I go on thursday mornings since I am already in town early anyway.  My uncle invited me several months back when his  presbyterian church takes part and I've done it ever since. 
The next dream was a continuation of a real conversation we had on the couch the night before.  I asked her "in our 7-8 years of marriage have you ever REALLY excepted my love and accepted the fact that I love you?"  It was a burning question I had to ask. . . the short answer was no. . I went to bed asking God why, though it's flagrant I did some damage with the affairs.  She said in her dream we were back on the couch and  I asked the question. . .but then it was a deep voice asking it. . .and the voice said to her "how can you love Tate or accept his love if you cannot accept my love for you?  She clearly understood this voice as God.  I was excited to hear that she had this dream this morning when she told me. Needless to say, I will avoid telling her mine.  She said then there were flashes from pictures of her past that kept popping up.  Things that might be preventing her from releasing her heart and accepting love in return. . . 

All the latest

I've had a slew of dreams the past weeks, obviously I've not kept up with a daily log, but this is due to the fact many haven't been worth remembering . . . or even remembered.  
Had another dream of a storm coming over a group of mountains with snow in the forecast following the thunderstorm.  I remember being with the fam and the snow came, it was pure and peaceful and I woke up.  A co-worker of mine felt the need to read the scripture from Job 33:14 that very same day.  I thought it interesting. 

I had a dream about "her" and she approached me very angry and yelling at me for doing what I did to her. . .leading her on ect. . .I got angry back. . .I took the noble route in reality and just told her what she needed to hear to move on.  In my dream I told her that she didn't really love me either. . .I said something to the effect of, "you say you love me, but making out with other guys and my friends really proved that to me."  "I never asked you to give anything up because it would have been selfish of me, I wanted you to do it on your own and you couldn't!  I'm supposed to give up my family, risk losing them,  and committ to a girl who can't even give up a few boyfriends and committ to me?!"  It shows how much you trusted me, how could I trust you then? (wrote a song about it on my youtube site) And something she said to me our last night together. . .she needed to know if she could tolerate my views. . .I said something in my dream to the effect of I don't need someone who can tolerate me, but who will respect my views the way I do yours.
These are all the things I wanted to say in real life, but never did. . .I just let her have her hay day with me. . .and it hurt at the time. . .I guess I needed to get it out of my system.  Then for some reason i was at her apartment and she was taking a shower before I woke up.
Last night I had a dream i was packing ice in someones back seat. . .then it flipped to me working at Eagle and they wanting me and others to take part in a coal mining project.  I refused.  Then I had a dream about my current boss conducting a meeting with us today and discussing the possibility of letting people go if we didn't aquire certain contracts. . . something that actually occurred today. . . it was like deja vu.  and that means a glitch in the matrix. . .

The Weather outside is frightful

Last night, the only dream I can recall.  I was with my wife and kids.  I get a phone call from some woman. . .unsure who. . .she calls me and tells me to stay inside your house/home and don't go outside.  Outside there is a storm brewing.  I see dark clouds and the wind is picking up.  I wake up.  Relevant?  Reminds me, men. If you are looking to have an affair with another woman and are thinking about getting serious. . .don't.  She more than likely has no clue what the hell she wants.  women, you thinking about getting with a married man?  don't.  Heartache will ensue.  storms will brew if you leave the house for a concubine. . .i don't mean to make the woman to be the bad apple.  only in my experience.  yes, unfortunately.  thank God for grace. . .

sex and swimming

So last night I remembered to remember some of my dreams...
It begins with me helping my parents move into a new house down the road from their current house. . .omg, the infamous "she" is in my dream again.  (read previous posts to find out who "she" is)   she is on the road behind ours.  her bosses vehicle (an old acquaintance)  is in her parking lot.  I think to myself. . .ew, but she is always talking about being lonely, (a poor excuse btw) she ends up coming over to talk to my dad. . .I ignore it. . .dream moves on to the san antonio town hall.  I am swimming in a pond with others and the pond extends into the town hall.  I swim out of the water and swim over the steps leading out of the water.  (i recently visited some people at our town hall, prob incorporated this into my dream)  I see a young woman and "swim/fly" over to her.  she leads me to an office with two other young women.  I begin to have sex with this girl on their desk while kissing the other two girls. . .the first girl dissipates into thin air. yea,  I know. . . without going into much detail, i being having sex with one of the other girls.  She is riding me because that provides the most stimulation for her. . .then I wake up. 
Again I would like to note. . .I am hoping for even sex dreams to be absent from my mind, but sometimes dreams are hard to control.  I would like that only my wife be a part of my dream life. . .haven't mastered that ability. . .

two birds one stone

So i skipped a night so here is two in one.
Tues morning.  Beltway is holding service outside, our pastor asks me to come up for a demonstration.  The grass makes steps and a seating place for everyone.  I finish and have to walk back up the steps.  "she" is there with her dad.  I try to not notice.  Her dad gets up and is waiting for me.  I think he's about to punch me.  He just says hello and I shake his hand pat him on the shoulder say hey how are you good to see you and walk on past. . .I happen to like her family in real life, good people.  Then I'm at hardin-simmons with jason who was in BEGE's with me (frat) he is a little on the slow side.  A couple guys from cooper are making fun of him.  I've always had a problem with people making fun of individuals who might be . . .challenged.  I stuck up for him in real life going toe to toe to a douchebag football player (at the time) at HSU and people had to break us up.  Don't care when people mess with me, but not someone else.  I had a problem with these guys.  They kept at me and at some point I warned them, when they wanted to fight, that I knew karate (aikido to be exact) and by law I had to tell them if i kicked their asses. (which I don't think is true)  I'm not big on harping on my ass kickery skills.  I don't like others who feel they have to tell others how good they are in karate either.  Use your head right and you can get out of most fights and be friends is my philosophy.  Dream over.

This morning.    Somethinf about driving with a co-worker getting pulled over and getting a ticket.  I mention this is the 12th ticket on this road and I use God's name in vain.  But I have doubts GD is using it in vain because "God" is more a title than a name.  YHWH, if you believe in the Hebrew God, is his actual name. The reason they left out the vowels was out of reverence.  maybe it's because I have thought this in my head as of late and I am justifying myself. . .but still worth a mention. Next went to some scene recusitating an individual at my parents. . .unsuccesfully.  I am cpr licensed and trained.  didn't do so well in my dream.  The End. 

strange and irrelevant

i open my dream sequence at my memaws and pepaws old house on primrose.  I'm spending the night, but my age.  I go to the kitchen for a drink and find my pepaws favorite drink jack daniels on the counter.  Looks good, but my dream shifts.  I'm at some skate park and this guy is hesitant to desert his coke for a minute afraid that it will get stolen.  The host, as it turns into some tv show, challenges the man to walk around the park and see if it is still there by the time he gets back.  . .a mini train passes through as the cameras follow it and the man makes it back and the coke is still there.  Leaving the park, two busses of ronald mcdonald wanna be's are unloading from the buss, smiling and doing their best ronald impersonation. . .I act scared. . .I kinda am.  i look for my car in the parking lot and another woman gets in her car next to me, she looks like sarah silverman. . . she's kinda cool.  I back out and she appears upset I didn't let her go first. . .she's no longer cool.  I back out and peel out pretending to be mad to get her attention and start doing uncontrollable donuts and hit the front passenger side of a minivan. . . nice. . .I leave thinking noone caught me, but notice 6 cameras around the perimeter.  I exit anyway hoping the driver wont notice and think to look at the cameras. . .I wake up, go back to sleep have some less than memorable dreams and thus concludes my night.

Random Dreams

Dreams last night were sporatic and random. . .and I don't recall much.  If i don't put into any effort remembering them whatever point I wake, it doesn't help to keep a diary.  here it goes.  I remember shaving my head in the shower and a friend I used to club with was telling me I need to hurry or I'd be late and what type blade works best. . .I was having trouble because I let my hair grow longer before the last shave.  What I was late for, apparently was class.  It was a mix between college and high school. A blue carpeted floor. My friend Precious, who used to put my hair in a pony tail in Earth Science was in my dream at some point.  The class was empty, seats against the wall and then at some point I'm sitting there waiting for my grade to be announced with others.  I made an 89 on my exam. . .ah yes, precious apparently made a 109 because she answered the bonus question.  Thus concludes a moderately boring dream session.  They can't all be wild and unruly!

Dreaming into Saturday

Friday night.  I don't remember much. . .I was in a house with all sorts of "keys".  Clock keys, wooden keys, long keys for mechanical devices and I was using them to unlock doors and secret rooms and compartments.  My second dream I was in a western.  I had a gang of bandits after me.  Something like in Tombstone.  I was running and shooting for my life.  I had a six shooter, but the bullets went into a little compartment in the gun.  I don't know how it fired, but it did.  I faced off with another cowboy trying to take my life and shot him a few times before he had a chance.  He wanted to shake my hand afterward as he lay there dying with blood soacking his shirt chest.  I told him I was sorry and he told me good job. . .just long enough for his henchmen came out shooting.  My gun was apparently a borrowed gun, and I've heard in movies never trust another mans gun.  This was one case, because it kept misfiring.  I woke up shortly thereafter.

My wife spoke of her dream. She dreamed she was riding in the car with "the other woman" and they were arguing with each other about me.  The other woman was trying to convince Abbye why I loved her more than my wife.  I told abbye that she(the other woman) was probably a  manifestation of her sub concious.  so really, she was arguing with herself. 

Dream Diary of Tate 1

Because I am facinated by dreams and their significance I will be posting a dream diary from this point on.  Some may be more lucid than others.  Some may be innappropriate for young audiences, simply because I cannot control all my dreams. 
I will begin with Wednesday leading into Thursday. 
I dreamed about a young woman from recent past.  This is the first dream I've had that she isn't trying to make me jealous by trying to be seen by me while she goes out with one of my friends.  She is usually distant and I usually avoid her.   This past dream she was sitting in a bed with me looking sullen and I reached for her hand just to hold it in a consoling manner.  She then proceeds to lay her head on my shoulder and leans in to kiss me, whispering something in my ear, but I deny her kiss.  *Delilah*. . .  In my head I'm telling myself  I don't want to take myself down that road again...and tell her I can't.  mixed feelings awoke me with that dream. . .oddly enough my wife was struggling with memories, memories she lived vicariously through me. . .since this is a girl I had an affair with.  Not the only one, just the one I had almost left my entire family for. Someone I had. . .or convinced myself shared this deep mutual connection with me. . . Much bigger sacrifice than she would have made on her part. . .but that is another story and this is my dream log. 

Leading into Friday Nov 26.  Don't remember my dream at this time.